M is for Misheard Comments and Fun with Puns.

Today I have a few tidbits to pass along to you.  Some are my own, some have no author, but is noted if available.

 

  •  Yesterday I  phoned a neighbor. “Did you hear that someone was shooting a pellet gun at…,” I said.

“Shooting pelicans!  Who would shoot a pelican?”  she said.

 

  • I came up with a modern day title for Lil Bo Peep who lived in Seattle, Her story would be called Sheepless in Seattle.

 

  • The phrase ‘raining cat and dogs’ never made much sense to me.  But ‘cats and dogs reigning…’  is true.

 

  •  What do you call traffic congestion on a bridge?  Car strangled spanner.

 

  • And here’s one from the impending disaster department: The blond phones the food editor Thanksgiving morning.  “How long do you cook a sixteen pound turkey?”  “Just a minute,” says the editor as he consults a chart.  “Thanks a lot!” says the blond as she hangs up.

 

  • I thought it good to have an open mind, until someone told me mine was obviously vacant.

 

And here are some serious quotes:  Some people complain because God put thorns on roses, while other praise him for putting roses among the thorns.

And this one from Louis Nizer;  “A man who works with his hands is a laborer; a man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman; but a man who works with his hands and his brain and his heart is an artist.”  (Between You and Me, Beechurst Press, 1948)

Do you have a favorite quote or pun?  See if you can top any of mine!

 

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2 thoughts on “M is for Misheard Comments and Fun with Puns.

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